Saturday, April 17, 2010

Adjusting to two.

We are so happy to finally be home.  The drive back took us over 12 hours and we drove straight through the night.  Yes, we are that crazy!  We just couldn't wait to get out of there.  It sounds awful, and there was nothing we didn't like about the city we were in, we were just ready to be home.  We had to stop at my in-laws in Philadelphia because they had our dog and we had our mother-in-law.  We got there at about 4:30am. N is not a big fan of car rides.  It seems to upset her little tummy and I had to sleep the rest of the night with her in a recliner.  Not that I minded, she is just too sweet for words.  This is one happy mama...

Since we've been to our actual home in NY it has been a bit of an adjustment, but no complaints.  We were all so very tired so the first day was mostly spent sleeping and getting groceries!  We were gone for almost two weeks so any food we had that wasn't frozen was bad.  We didn't even have milk for KJ. 

So far the two kids does certainly mean twice the work!  But they are both a different kind of work and KJ is so good to his sister that it is an adjustment, but not in a bad way.  Just more to get used to. :)

Monday, April 12, 2010

Blog invites...

...will be out soon! We cleared ICPC today and are driving through the night to get to my in-laws (who have our dog, and we have my mother-in-law!). And then we'll drive on to home tomorrow evening. So I promise to get them out soon as I can! Not much on there yet anyway. ;)

Peace,
Andi and the gang
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Private Blog.

Hey Friends,

As promised I have started a private blog for the kids. I won't be discussing them much here nor will I post pictures.  This blog will remain my "adoption soap box" for deeper discussion.  The other will be purely for the purpose of bragging!

If you'd like an invite just shoot me an email to: ME HERE and I'll add you.  The url is http://aprincessandtheking.blogspot.com.  Hope to see you there!

Andi

Gender Preference in Adoption.

Not gonna lie.  It gives me the yuckies.  This all started today because I somehow (maybe on Twit.ter?) ended up on someone's "We're Hoping to Adopt" site and along with all the lovely pictures it said "we have two boys and want a girl" (not exactly like that, but that was the gist).  What?!  I'm sorry, but what gives any of us the right to choose or demand a child of a certain gender? 

Now I get that in international adoption many times you must state a preference.  But in domestic adoption that is not the case. I guess my main issue with stating a preference is that it instantly becomes all about you and what you want, it has nothing to do with the child.  Of course it is ultimately up to the expectant mother/family and if they don't mind a person saying they want a boy or girl, well then that's up to them.  But the bottom line is adoption needs to be about the child and not about what we as adoptive parents want.  Besides, ultrasounds are not fool proof.  If this child comes out a boy is the a-family going to refuse him and give him back?  If any of us a-parents were pregnant would we  not accept our child if they came out as our non-preferred gender?  No, adoption is not natural childbirth, but I believe that we should all have the same commitment to our adopted children as if we birthed them.  So if we cannot choose through pregnancy why should we be able to choose in adoption?


Our first adoption was through an agency and they would not allow gender specificity in a domestic adoption.  I appreciated that.  This time around we stated no preference as the choice is God's, not mine.  I guess this all just bothers me because it feels like adoptive parents trying to get even in the baby-making game.  Something like, "well if I cannot conceive I should at least be able to get what I really want!"  Perhaps this is not how it is and I am certainly not pointing any fingers, this is just how it seems to me.  

Again, I understand that adoption is not childbearing in the same way, but shouldn't your commitment and unconditional love to that child be the same from the very beginning?  I welcome your thoughts!





Monday, April 5, 2010

We have a baby girl!!

Sorry I have been a bit MIA. It is for good reason! We have been
out-of-state meeting our new daughter! She was born April 1st. She is a
tiny little thing. :)
More details to follow. I will have a separate private blog soon just for
updates on the kids. I don't like putting their pictures and names out in
public. For now if you want to see pictures and her name, etc. you can
friend me on Faceb.ook. I am at www.facebook.com/andils. Hope to see you
there!!